daringtobe's Diaryland Diary

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Sick to my stomach

I knew it...just when I had a decent lunch with my brother I come back and all hell breaks loose and life decides to take a big bite out of my ass. My hands are shaking and my mouth is dry. After this afternoon I may not have parents any more. Odd to think about. People you have spent your life trying to take care of, never appreciating it, calling you ungrateful and selfish. I never thought my father would turn on me...I knew lately he has been critical of me but I had no idea. After tonight all I will have is my brother.

wow........................

well, there are worse things I suppose...amputation, Lou Gehrigs disease, drug addiction. The list goes on, but somehow losing your parental figures no matter how shitty they are still makes you feel entirely alone.

Please let me have the strength tonight that I need....please. My brother is going with me. I feel like I need protection...not from physical abuse - but from the verbal onslaught. I am not used to my father hating me.

Wish me well..................

1:52 p.m. - 2003-09-12

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